It has been 146 days since my last Ramble. The longest I’ve gone without one since I started the practice in 2019. Unthinkable. Then again, the idea of even recording one was also unthinkable for a huge swath of those days. What a strange and challenging time.
Between the weight of the world and my new role as a full-time caregiver, I’m barely managing to do my own work, which means I have no time for the work around the work—the work about the work. It feels like this second kind of work is what actually brings people to my door. The art is fine, but the thinking and talking ABOUT the art (and the craft, and the business, and the being-human-ness of it all) is what I’ve come to rely on for my livelihood. It also gives me a sense of greater meaning within the landscape of my chosen profession. It helps me feel connected to something bigger.
It took me 30 minutes to record this Ramble, two hours to edit the transcript, another hour to get the links collected and the post written and everything uploaded to Patreon and my website. Factor in crucial tea-drinking time and we’re probably looking at four hours for the whole production.
Getting four hours to do work in a given day is such a luxury right now—no wonder I haven’t found time for this. But I think I need it. I don’t know for sure. Maybe I’m just hooked on the feeling of being productive or sharing or reflecting, but this process grounds me. It surprises me. It keeps me in touch with all of you, which I love deeply.
Okay maybe I do know for sure. I do. This is worth making and taking time for.
Referenced in this Ramble:
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My blog posts on leaving the internet, the long tail of COVID trauma, and posting frequency as an indicator of mental health
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This quote I mentioned, “The COVID era marches on, wearily chanting its mantra: ‘I don’t know the right thing to do, so I guess I’ll just stay home.’” comes from Rob Weychert’s blog
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One of the essays I’ve appreciated lately: Writing and Parenting in the Pandemic Blur of Day to Day Life
I said it in the Ramble but I’ll say it again here: I am so grateful for you all, and for this continued space to burble my thoughts into the ether and hear your good thoughts in return.
Thank you <3
L
P.S. The transcript, if you prefer to read rather than listen, is attached to this post. Let me know if you run into any difficulty with it.
