Just in time for my next event at Bart’s Books, I’ve finally finished cutting together the audio of my previous conversation there with creative powerhouse Tessa Hulls! This talk was recorded on her whirlwind book tour for Feeding Ghosts, a stunning matrilineal graphic memoir that rocked me to my core and has remained on my mind all year.
Tune in to hear us talk about sustaining ourselves during interminable creative projects, insights from Tessa’s seven-month isolated wilderness residency, and some Patented Bellwood Questions about money in publishing under a springtime sunset.
Tessa also read us an excerpt from the book, which I’ve included in the audio because the words absolutely hold up on their own (although obviously the ideal way to experience the book is to get your hands on a copy).
Longtime readers might remember this chat we recorded back in 2018. Many themes in this more recent conversation are the same, but the intervening years have changed us both in some pretty significant ways. I hope we get to cross paths again and answer all these questions anew another six years down the line.
I have so much admiration for Tessa as a fellow uncategorizeable creative force. She continues to remind me what it can look like to blend all the disparate passions of our lives into something rich and strange. I hope that affection and enthusiasm come through in this conversation, and that you’re able to read her book soon.
After looking over the Big Weirdies at a recent show, a friend said with a wink-wink laugh, “I’ll have what he’s having.”
He’s welcome to it! What I’m having is fun.
I really like this post from my pal Christopher about his approach to “super-saturation and world-building” in his paintings without the use of psychedelics (despite what many people seem to think upon viewing them).
I’m joining the inimitable Carson Ellis for a conversation at Bart’s Books this month! Come help celebrate the release of her new book, One Week in January, on October 12th in the Bart’s courtyard from 6-7pm. We’ll be chatting about creative booms in funky towns, spending time with our younger selves, and finding community in rural spaces. Event details here.
Here’s a bit more about the book:
In January 2001, […] 25-year-old Ellis moved into a warehouse in the Central Eastside with a group of fellow artists. For the first week she lived there, Ellis kept a detailed diary recording only the minutiae of each day, mostly as a brain exercise to stave off what she perceived as memory loss. A couple years ago, having recently rediscovered the volume in a crate of letters and keep-sakes, she set to illustrate the two-decade-old journal with rich gouache paintings, evocatively capturing a specific cultural moment of the early 2000s.
Offering here a snapshot of a bygone era and a meticulous re-creation of quotidian frustrations and small, meaningful moments, One Week in January is a meditation on what it means both to start your journey as an artist and to look back at that beginning many years later.
You can also see all the original paintings from the book at Nationale in Portland through October 19th!
There are tons of things I love about this project, but I’m specifically delighted by it as a time capsule of the Portland that was already dissolving when I arrived there as a college student in late 2009. I know the buildings and markets Carson mentions in her diary! I’ve visited friends’ painting studios in those same warehouses! I’ve shopped at those corner stores! But the version of the city I found was slightly newer, the grime a bit less visible. The city I visit now—the one she still lives outside of—is newer still.
And then, of course, there’s the collapsing tunnel that flings me back further in my own life. A year after writing this diary, Carson would illustrate the cover of Castaways and Cutouts—the first album from The Decemberists, fronted by her now-husband (and frequent diary apparition) Colin Meloy. By the time I started high school in 2003 I was eagerly bringing their songs to play at Morning Assembly. As a tall ship sailor in the late 2000s, it was basically mandatory that one listen to a band with so many raucous, anachronistic, shanty-like tunes under their belt—not to mention the nautical art Carson made for each release. The thought of sitting down as something like peers to discuss Carson’s work from that era is surreal in the extreme.
Now that I think of it, one of my favorite reads from this year, Dear Sophie, Love Sophie, likewise begins with the recovery of a painfully earnest diary and spins it into something compassionate and affirming in the present day.
It’s more graphic novel than pairing of painting and text, but equally heartfelt and charming. (I’m just a big fan of Sophie Lucido Johnson, generally speaking. Her newsletter is great.)
Oh, Carson has a newsletter, too! It’s called Slowpoke.
Okay, I think that’s it for promotion. See you at Bart’s!
I wish I could be in the Pacific Northwest to attend one of these screenings for Dark and Tender, a film exploring the work of Aaron Johnson and the Chronically UnderTouched (CUT) Project.
From their website:
The Chronically UnderTouched (CUT) Project is a movement supporting People of the Global Majority — people of color — to recover healthy, nourishing, platonic touch in a culture that, in the United States, denies it at every turn.
Born out of the development and tracking of the Chronically UnderTouched trauma story, the CUT Project develops accessible practices — deep listening, song, access to nature — as antidotes to the Black Brute archetype. […] Tender, thoughtful touch and holding, to the Black male body, is so dangerous to white supremacy that they use all matters of violence to erase this practice.
I’m watching my dad decline and trying to stay present for the version of him that remains and always, always thinking about grief in this country. How we drown it, gloss over it. We’re starved of the emotional technology that helps us process any of this. Our rituals fall so short. Aaron’s work illuminates the ways this deprivation disproportionately impacts people of color, making it all the more timely.
These days my ears perk up when someone speaks with the candor that comes from living through immeasurable loss. I find myself gravitating to places I never would’ve called home before: grief circles, mortality workshops, books and books and books about mourning, death, and ceremony.
Touch is a cornerstone of survival in this season. The older I get, the more deeply I know it. I know it because I want it. I want lingering hugs that last a full breath. I want leonine forehead to forehead greetings. I want a hand on the shoulder, a back scratch, the reassuring weight of leaning into someone side by side. I want to feel us shoring each other up, reminding one another that we are warm and breathing and alive, even as we hold everything that breaks us.
There’s a delicate, industrious ticking at my left-hand side. A tiny golden hand advancing second by second around the upturned face of a watch from 1969. My grandfather’s watch. A watch I didn’t know existed before this month, belonging to a man I’d never met, whose personal effects I just traveled 5300 miles to retrieve after 30 years in storage.
I’ve always been a sucker for tiny, functional items; things that carry the evidence of daily activity and the particular devotion of the mundane. A monument may dazzle, but it’s the sealed jar from Pompeii that sticks with me after all these years, its lid lifted to reveal the scooped impression of three fingers in white cream.
How many times have I scooped lotion from a jar? Fidgeted with a ring? Buttoned on a coat?
How could I have known that winding this watch would bring it back to life as if no time at all had passed?
It’s happening again, the thing that happens when I get back to drawing after a slump.
The transition was abrupt. I woke up two weeks ago, went to the studio, queued up Neil Gaiman’s live reading of The Graveyard Book (my habitual comfort food of many years), cranked out four pages, rode my stationary bike for a half hour, and then took it upon myself to begin eating a whole head of lettuce every day to finally get ahead of our CSA box. The transition was shocking in its ease, especially when I hold it up beside weeks and weeks of disruption and self-judgement. I’ve been torn between dog-sitting gigs, two different living situations, visits from friends, heart procedures at the hospital with my dad, studio moves, traveling out of state for events, and passing obsessions with whittling, ultralight backpacking, and quilting scattered in between.
Writing it all out, I soften. Of course I’ve struggled to sink into the kind of flow state needed for real progress on my book. There’s been no consistency! No ritual! No routine! My poor little animal brain doesn’t know how to make sense of it all.
But now that the gears have clicked into place and I’m suddenly off to work every morning like clockwork, the other thing happens: I lock down. I become superstitious and squirrelly, prone to evading all well-meaning attempts at conversation from the people I love.
“How’d it go at the studio today?”
“What’s your page goal this week?”
“When are you heading to work?”
Too much scrutiny makes me fearful. The ease of transition is suspicious. How did this happen? Why did I magically wake up and find it simple to return to work on this day of all days? If I don’t understand it, anything might switch it off again. So I err on the side of secrecy, and remain a jealous guardian of my time.
It’s been two weeks of consistent creative flow. It’s working for now. I’ll bask in it for as long as it lasts.
A month ago, encouraged by this wonderfully clear explainer comic from Maia Kobabe, I bought an eSim for someone in Gaza via Connecting Humanity. Like Maia, mine took a while to get assigned and activated, but this morning IT HAPPENED.
(This is just an excerpt from Maia’s full comic. You can read the rest here.)
I try to pay a lot of attention to how taking various actions makes me feel. Not because activism shouldn’t include things that are difficult or painful, but because I’m a human creature and I know that I gravitate towards things that bring me pleasure or fulfillment. If I can embody my values in a way that’s rewarding, I’m going to be far more effective in my work. I see this in the people I admire: a kind of joyous integrity that drives fundraisers and community events, art projects and experiments.
The feeling I got seeing that eSIM activated and streaming data was very similar to what Maia describes in her comic. A burst of hope! A jolt of delight! The understanding that a stranger across the world, in unimaginably horrifying circumstances, has the chance to reach out and be heard—to connect.
In a season where everything about the internet feels poisoned, I’m reminded that data can mean hearing a loved one’s voice, subscribing to updates from emergency personnel, letting your children distract themselves with a cartoon on YouTube, or sharing the lived reality of life in a war zone. These are all means of spiritual and physical survival, and we can gift them to others.
If you feel moved to give it a go yourself, there’s an ongoing 5% discount code for Nomad Middle East eSims (NOMADCNG) and I have a personal code for 25% off (LUCYUADYUW) anyone’s first order. The full instructions for purchasing and donating eSims can be found on Connecting Humanity’s eSim page.
(Enormous respect to Mirna El Helbawi, the organizing force behind Connecting Humanity and Maia Kobabe, for always sharing such clear and humanizing comics. The title of this post comes from a chapter about the internet in Dan Nott’s fantastic book Hidden Systems.)
Our town (~9,000 people) has a couple garages, but there’s a big one on the main drag. My family has been going there for decades. I drive past it every day.
There used to be a huge pine tree on the corner of their lot, but last year it became a hazard and had to be taken down.
Shortly thereafter I drive by and see they’ve hired a guy to chainsaw sculpt the stump into a bald eagle.
Birds own my heart, but nationalism makes me twitchy. I withhold outright condemnation of the eagle, but I’m skeptical. (The original owner—an objectively Good Dude—sold the business to a younger couple a few years ago, and I don’t have any knowledge of their whole deal.)
Then it turns out someone on staff is really into making costumes for the eagle. Every holiday. Every month. Stuffed turkey, witch costume, menorah headpiece, bunny ears. These people love to dress their bird.
The changing of the eagle suit becomes a source of joy every time I drive through town.
Until June, when the eagle is bare.
Now look, maybe I’m expecting too much asking my garage to celebrate Pride. But this is a small town. Every time I drive by that stupid eagle—this thing that has previously brought me so much joy—I feel hurt. I feel reminded that there are plenty of people in my liberal bubble who don’t consider my community worthy of celebration. I drive to work, I feel bad. I drive home, I feel bad. The eagle is mocking me.
Then my A/C quits working.
So I book an appointment to bring my car in—and realize what I have to do.
I pick all this up at a thrift store for under ten bucks. I print the shirt with some weird heat-transfer fabric crayons I find in a cupboard. I loop gold elastic around the sunglasses and pray they’ll fit on the eagle’s head. (It is also important to draw your attention to the price of the feather boa.)
Nice.
My reasoning is thus: if I show up with a complete costume ready to go, someone will have to look me in the eye and say “We don’t believe in that,” at which point I’ll be finding a new garage. But if they let me dress the eagle, then people in town get to have the joy I’ve been missing since the start of the month.
I listen to a lot of hype-up jams on my way over. I hate confrontation. I also don’t wanna have to find another garage. I want to believe that this decision isn’t actively antagonistic, but I’m not particularly hopeful.
I talk through the A/C issue with the guy at the desk, hand over my keys, then take a deep breath.
“Who’s in charge of the eagle?”
“Oh, that’s all Dylan. Second bay from the end.”
I walk down the row of hydraulic lifts and find a disarmingly smiley middle-aged man pouring fluid through a funnel. I introduce myself and explain that, since the Pride parade is this Sunday and the eagle seems to be missing a costume, I have taken the liberty of making one myself, and can I get his blessing to go put it on?
Back in 2016 I had the pleasure of working on a piece for The Nib about renewed efforts to bring wind-powered shipping to the international trade scene. I chatted with a handful of passionate, fascinating people and just got to scratch the surface of what was happening at the time. Somewhere in the years that followed, between multiple changes in hosting and ownership, the comic disappeared from The Nib’s archives, so I’m re-posting it here on my own site to make sure it stays up for future readers to investigate.
(I’m still mucking around with the best way to format this kind of thing for my own site, but this’ll do for now. You can use the arrows to scroll through thumbnails, or click the image to read in a bigger carousel viewer.)
Between the disruption of the Pandemic, the rigors of caregiving, and the long tunnel of working on a new book, conventions have felt like a thing of the past for me. The travel, the crowds, the need to produce and sell and be ON have all seemed difficult to reach in this phase of my life. But there are some shows you just know in your heart are worth the bother, and I’m happy to say that I listened to my intuition and applied for this one back when they announced the deadline.
The Ann Arbor Comic Arts Festival is a lovely, kid-specific show that’s FREE (we love a free show) and takes place at the Ann Arbor District Library (WE LOVE A LIBRARY) from 11-5 (WE LOVE A SHOW WITH REASONABLE OPENING HOURS) this Saturday the 15th and Sunday the 16th. My previous visits to A2CAF have always left me feeling so revved up and grateful to be working in comics, and I’m sure this one will be no exception.
Here’s a handy map of where I’ll be (Table #1), unless I’m off doing one of the lightning Quick Draw events, which are scattered throughout the weekend:
Some other folks I’d recommend checking out are:
Cara Bean (Table 25), with her new mental health for kids book Here I Am, I Am Me (this is going to be the first thing I buy)
Alec Longstreth (Table 3), one of my earliest comics teachers, who continues to inspire and delight with his series Basewood and a host of other projects
Lauren Houser (Table 11), who I had the pleasure of collaborating with on a story for Spitball #7, the CCAD comics anthology that pairs working pros with up and coming student artists
Vera Brosgol (Signing at Green Brain Comics, Tables 8-10), celebrating her new book Plain Jane and the Mermaid (the second thing I’m going to buy), which I had the pleasure of contributing to in a small way by getting on FaceTime to puzzle out some Boat Issues
Jen Wang (Signing at Green Brain Comics, Tables 8-10), whose first graphic novel, Koko Be Good, continues to shape the way I think about character, story, and expressive acting on the page
I also have some original pages appearing in Drawing Worlds: The Art of Comics and Beyond at the Ann Arbor Art Center. The opening reception will take place Friday from 6-8pm, but the show runs all the way till July 3rd. (I believe they also have some of my stuff for sale in the gift shop!)
